"The cherry petals are falling fast."

I looked up from my accounting information systems textbook, squinting as the sun hit my eye. "Yeah, they are. It's too bad."

"What are you talking about?" asked Li Heng.

"Um, the petals? I agree, they are falling pretty fast."

Li Heng gave me a look that said, "You're so ADD," and returned her attention to finish her origami heart.

Shrugging, I decided someone else must have said it to someone else. "A DFD represents the path and transformation of information between important data storage areas." I groaned. "You chose this major, you chose it, you chose it." Gazing up at the rest of the Quad, I savored the sight of brick paths and vast grassy areas generously sprinkled shy pink petals. Spring was finally here, and my world was in gauzy haze.

"The petals are falling fast."

I took a moment to contemplate the location and volume of that statement. "What if I said they weren't?"

"What weren't what?" asked Li Heng.

I looked around us. No one else was close enough for me to hear them that clearly. "You know what," I said, "If you're going to pull an April Fool's, freak me out or something. This is lame."

"Well good. I'm not pulling an April Fools. In fact, I forgot it was today."

Rolling my eyes, I smiled and went back to reading.

I went to Systems lecture an hour later, when I realized something was wrong. The classroom held about forty people, long tables and chairs included. I sat down in the very back row, twiddling with my pencil and opening OneNote 2007 on my laptop. One of the people walking in caught my eye. He was extremely tall and unbelievably skinny. His skin color was black--no, brown. No, he could be from southern China or Southeast Asia. He could be Latino. His cheekbones looked painfully sharp, and his smile showed bleach-white teeth.

Suddenly, his features disappeared, and his entire body, backpack, clothes and all,
turned into a bright green silhouette.

My jaw dropped. He waved. I looked at the people in front of me. Even as the guy turned a deeper green, they chatted away about last night's homework and took out their notebooks. Our instructor calmly walked by him and hooked his laptop to the classroom projector. The silhouette only had a set of white teeth showing through the color.

"Holy crap," I said.

The shape took a step forward, and the professor began lecturing. "Alright, let's get started!"

Green Man made his way down between our two columns of tables, picking up his spindly knees like a giant grasshopper. "Ho-ly crap." Was I hallucinating? I slammed my laptop shut, making my neighbor jump, stuffed it in my backpack, and by the time I was sidling away at the outer rim of tables, the professor had paused angrily, and Green Man was pushing in my seat in for me. "Sorry," I told the professor. "Doctor's appointment."

I walked out of the classroom and slammed the door. Walking backwards, I saw green fingers and toes sticking out of the wood, then a forehead. Turning, I ran. I speed-dialed Li Heng. No answer. She was in class. Running down the concrete stairway exposed to the outside, I speed-dialed several others. Finally, I speed-dialed Mom.

"Wei?"

"Mama, I just wanted to say I love you." If I was about go insane or about to die, I wanted her to know I loved her. "And Baba and Meimei too."

"Oh," said Mom, pleasantly surprised. "Okay, call me when you get home. I love you too."

When I got down to the final floor, I ran straight into a cold, melting glass pane. Light sparkled around the mass, and it turned into the original guy again, skin, clothes, backpack and all. Still disoriented, I stumbled back into the stairs, tripped, and fell on my behind.

"Are you okay?" he asked.

Crab-style, I scrambled back up the stairs on all fours. "What the hell are you?"

"I was going to ask you the same thing," he said. His features disappeared again, and this time he turned a depressing gray. "All I know is, I am called Chuh Sherr."

I think I've gained some wisdom from high school that I didn't know about and that I should have followed -- twice.

Before it gets serious:
1) Be picky
2) Be picky
3) Be picky

A) If you like someone but they don't feel the same way, they might call you their little sibling. My conclusion: it's a condescending thing to do, especially if this person calls multiple people their little siblings. (Try reading up on sexual narcissism, basically an inferiority complex where the individual surrounds themselves with many of the opposite sex to assure themselves of their beauty/confidence/sex appeal.)

B) If you were crazy like me in high school, you'd still try to hang around the person even though they've got a love life. You'd try to ignore rude comments by the new couple, such as, "Oh baby you're being so horrible to me. Janet you can have him."

C) You might hang out with them even more because you want to try really hard to prove yourself above jealousy and/or subconsciously hope to be the person's rebound once they're single again.

D) To enhance your chances of being their rebound, you might try to "help" them hook up with different people or give them (or their S.O.) relationship advice. I was in denial of this while I did it.

E) When they actually do (if at all) break up, the person you liked in high school might retake you on your original offer and start to flirt with you. If you're as stupid as I was a year ago, you'd consider dating them before deciding it would be too awkward. You'd also begin to realize how shallow they were to begin with. If you're a complete idiot, however, you'd actually agree to finally be their rebound, mission accomplished. If you do, you can expect to be dumped for someone better looking/richer in the near future.

Wisdom gained from this:

A) If you think you're dating someone (like my high school self) who's hoping to be a rebound, don't wait patiently to be dumped. Just set them free, even if they don't realize their crush yet.

B) Early symptoms of a significant other or potential date who likes someone very close to them (I'm guilty of almost all of these):

--They try very hard to get the other person to break up with their significant other, ostensibly to get them a better significant other.

--They need this person's approval to date you. (A friend of mine had this happen to her, but not to me.)

--They subconsciously make sure you stick around to fill up the wait before their crush is finally single.

C) Late symptoms:

--The person you suspect to be their crush does break up with their significant other and begins showing envy towards your relationship.

--Your own significant other slowly stops calling you as often as they did during the infatuation phase. It's also a natural occurrence in a healthy relationship, only in this case they don't return your calls either and also avoid you.

D) If you see these symptoms:

Again, don't be angry. Just set them free so you're free sooner to look for someone with no one else on their mind, so you don't get hurt, nor do you have to watch the whole painful process hurt others as well.